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05 Oct

I would graduate by age 25 with at least one child and live happily ever after. Upon my return I would start my college career and find someone to marry.

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I have friends who unfortunately have chosen inactivity in the Church because they feel out of place, even though they have a testimony.In light of this, I would like to offer some suggestions to married members for interacting with singles—at the same time recognizing that we single members also bear responsibility for reaching out to married members of the Church.My single friends and I lead busy, productive lives.It is also much easier to find common ground that way.I believe the vast majority of single Church members wholeheartedly support the Church’s emphasis on the family.Being an “older” single hasn’t been easy, but I can say that in many ways I am grateful for this experience because I have grown tremendously from it.However, one aspect of being single still perplexes me: the separation I sometimes feel from married members of the Church.Some good-natured teasing can be enjoyable in almost any relationship.But I will admit that I groan when I hear the all-too-familiar quote about single men above 25 being “a menace to society.” Even though people who say this are usually well intentioned, such comments send the indirect message that we single men are purposely shirking the responsibility of marriage.However, I am most receptive to advice that I have requested—usually from people I have a close relationship with.Sometimes people will tell me that I “just need to get married.” But that is like telling a starving person that they “just need to eat.” We truly want to be married but are simply struggling with to do it.