Dating is dead

07 Nov

” My date with the Logistics Manager wasn’t memorable for what happened during the 25-minute coffee interlude, which had stretches of awkward silence, but for what happened afterwards. This dude peeled the creamers open one by one and drank them. And I can’t forget the Software Developer who had three large bottles of mouthwash in his car, one in the console and two others in the front door pockets. There’s no good explanation for having that much oral rinse in the front of your car. As you can see, the headaches and frustrations begin long before going on an actual date. We did the usual coffee thing, which by that time already seemed like more effort than it was worth. As he displayed each item, he’d say something like: “This comes in handy,” or “You never know when you might need these.” At the end of the “inventory,” he read me the poem he had written for his mother.I shook his hand and catapulted out of there, pointedly not saying, “It was lovely meeting you.” An hour after our deadly dull date, he sent me a text with a vulgar sexual suggestion. I tried tongue-in-cheek next, which led to pizza with the Sniffly Librarian. During our hour-long cappuccinos, Ad Guy emptied the contents of his Dockers pockets and gave me a detailed commentary on everything he carried: screwdriver, tissues, pocket knife, measuring tape, Purell, Band-Aids, wrench set, hammer, magnifying glass, eyeglass repair kit, two HMV gift cards, a poem to his mother, fire starter, antiseptic wipes, allergy pills, pen, notepad, Starbucks gift cards, family photos, TTC tokens, elastics . While I appreciate family bonds, reciting maternal verse was not the way to win me over. I know there are success stories out there, but it’s not in the cards for me.Back in the day where courtship was the norm, men were more willing to ‘commit’ to women who they respected and valued. In our digital age, we consider intimacy to be sexting or sending nudes, and we define chemistry as two people sending each other heart emojis.We scroll through profile after profile, judging attractiveness on bad quality photos and basing our interest on cheesy pick-up lines or on the type of pets people have. If we depend on an app to meet people, then doesn’t that make us more socially awkward?Whether addressing millennials, college students or a group of professionals seeking a meaningful relationship amidst their busy careers, Kevin delivers a message that provides direction and promotes honest dialogue.His unique perspective and engaging delivery have made him a sought after speaker across the country including appearances on ABC, BET, CBS, FOX and TBN.He had a fabric handkerchief in his pocket and honked into it repeatedly .

Then when that time comes when we get to meet our ‘match’ in real life, most of us get disappointed and we end up feeling lonelier.I really don’t agree with how we can order up a lover the same way we order a “special” on a menu.And if it doesn’t work out with someone, there are hundreds of other people from the dating pool to choose from, just as if we were picking sweets from a Pick’n’Mix candy bag.We have convinced ourselves that we can have la crème de la crème due to the abundance of options that exist. I’m not being prudish, but no one wants to become anyone’s side chick.Sex has become so easy that we act as if it was something handed to us on a dinner plate. So don’t be surprised when they tell you they don’t want anything “serious”. I’m only in my 40s, yet I’d rather be alone in a rocker playing Solitaire — with an actual deck of cards — than go on one more “coffee date.”I’ve tried various dating sites: Lava Life, Match, e Harmony, Plenty of Fish, OK Cupid, Tinder and Bumble. I hear that lots of people who have tried online dating have had similar experiences. I don’t even know how to explain that, other than to say he was covered in more plush than a truckload of teddy bears. My frustration isn’t only with the men I actually meet. I’ve met guys who look nothing like their profiles.Kevin Carr contrasts the expectations of relationships in modern day versus in previous generations.For example, what is considered a date today versus decades ago? Even with today’s advancements and unlimited opportunities, we still can’t escape our desire for companionship.Kevin Carr is an accomplished author, speaker and TV Host/Personality.With over a decade of experience, his perspective on dating offers a practical road-map to help navigate being single while learning to create the relationship you desire.