Dating men out of my league

21 Dec

This means that you are recognizing what you like in a person, and learning more about who you are really attracted to.

This will serve you well when you meet someone who is single and who has the qualities you like.

I was an ass, I made an incredible fool of myself, I traumatized my friends and worst of all, I hurt that poor girls feelings.

She wasn’t the nicest person and took advantage of me, but I hurt her feelings and I made sure when I came to my senses that I apologized, regardless of what she’d done, I messed up.

I hated the idea of feelings and I shut them out and didn’t do friends (ironically this is when I received most attention from the females).w=300&h=200 300w, https://captainawkwarddotcom.files.wordpress.com/2014/08/jamesbond.jpg? w=600&h=400 600w, https://captainawkwarddotcom.files.wordpress.com/2014/08/jamesbond.jpg? w=150&h=100 150w" sizes="(max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px" / To elaborate: Step I. Works by men, with male protagonists, dominate popular culture. If you aren’t good at acquiring these objects you are a loser or a failure.We all grow up on stories and messages where men go out and do great deeds and they rescue and/or win the love of women. These are the messages you are swimming in, and they are affecting your life.But I think it’s a good idea to make a deliberate year-long project of it at this time in your life, when you are trying to figure out how to relate to women better. You’re going to read/watch/listen to something, why not make an effort to seek out women’s voices and perspectives?Reason #3: It will give you many different perspectives on women as diverse human beings and allow you to hang out with women and get to know them in your imagination.We grow up, we figure it out, we stop doing that stuff.It is unlikely, being as self-aware as you are now, that you will repeat those same mistakes.A few years ago a I saw a very beautifully made and very personal student film about a lonely and shy young man who has insomnia so he walks around downtown late at night, visiting a diner where he has a crush on the waitress, and otherwise encountering women who all don’t notice him or outright reject him.It was beautifully shot and scored and acted, but I’m not sure that what’s stayed with me is what the filmmaker wanted to stay with me, which is that every single woman that the protagonist ran into in this world was young, pretty, white, able-bodied, straight, and assumed to be potentially dateable.And there is absolutely nothing wrong with being a late-bloomer, or in delaying romance and sex until you meet the right person or feel ready.I know it’s a bummer to get crushes on people who are already coupled up, but you are sparking with people!