I kissed dating goodbye thoughts

09 Nov

So yes, men should know what it’s like to get horrifying dick pics or threats from angry rejectees, and women should know what it’s like to get more widespread rejection in a month than most women get in a lifetime.Instead of comments that tell me how 85% of men are awful, creepy, stupid, perverted, old, short, and poor (when the number is actually 80%), I would love to hear you offer a sentence of sympathy for what the average man must go through to get a second date. As a man who dated online prolifically, I got rejected over 50% of the time before meeting.Conversely, most of my clients are ready to quit online dating if two or three cute guys don’t write back.As Leong, the author and UCLA professor put it: “Asian men can kick butt, but they can’t have a kiss.” It gets a little more personal in blogs, such as posts titled Us Bitter, Bitter Asian Men or Sucks to be an Asian male. I’ve had Chinese guys refuse me because they felt, as a traditional man, they could never see themselves married to a foreign girl.

Off the top of my head, I can think of Rachel De Woskin’s Foreign Babes in Beijing: Behind the Scenes of a New China and Repeat After Me: A Novel, Nicole Mones’ Lost in Translation, and Pearl S. So I began to wonder — why are there so few Chinese guys and foreign girls becoming couples?

It’s easy to gauge this reality on the website Candle for Love (CFL), devoted to helping US Americans bring their loved ones over from China.

CFL is like a tidal wave of American men in love with Chinese women, with only a rare American woman/Chinese husband surfacing to break the monotony. Several years ago, when my husband enrolled in a New Oriental class in Shanghai for GRE prep, the instructor warned all of the Chinese men: “If you’re going to study abroad, prepare for four lonely years.” The underlying message was, don’t expect to fall in love — but be pleasantly surprised if it happens.

That’s the entire essence of this blog; rather than complaining about why men should change (which they should!

), it’s more powerful to understand the people you’re trying to date.